Weening and Waiting

I stopped nursing McKenna last Saturday. It had been about a week. I didn't really ween. I just stopped like I did with Quinn. I started Clomid on Feb. 27, so it just made sense to ween when the clomid was going to help me dry up. I tried not to think about it too much because it really makes me sad. I loved nursing McKenna. I've been trying to hold her more often now that she is not nursing and doesn't automatically get that special time with me. Sometimes she just needs extra attention.

She still isn't moving much, but she is really trying to communicate more. I love when she pushes my hand away when I try to do something to her or give her something. She shakes her head and pushes my hand. She knows what she wants.

She had her first drop of essential oil in a small bottle of prune juice today. She cried for a long time after that and wouldn't eat dinner. It is probably not related.

As for the waiting. I am waiting to get pregnant again, waiting for Kenna to get teeth, move, and talk, and waiting for my chest to go back to normal.

But mostly I am just proud of my Kenna. She is so nice. She love people. She is her own girl. She was a great sport about weening, and she loves corn just like her mama.

We are headed to California on Thursday, and it has never once occurred to me that the flight might be a problem. I remember flying with Quinn at 9 months. It was hard. She was starting to not want to be on the lap. She was standing in the aisle. Different kid, different story, and I like it that way.

Shelly just called to say you are scooting backwards today. Nice work, lady. You normally don't like to move. But feel free to stay little.

Waving

McKenna learned to wave last week. She usually limits to sharing this privilege and communication to Tim and my friend Melissa. But right now she is watching Littler Einsteins and waving at the TV with all her soul. Man, this girls is so cute. I love her so much, obviously. But seriously ... I love that she can't crawl and doesn't seem to want to. She is much more interested in waving at friends, toys and TVs. I love it.

Hugging and Holding

I just can't hug McKenna enough these days. She is a lot more needy than Quinn ever was. I am pretty much a hands off momma. If you cry and cry and cry, it is bedtime. But with Mckenna, I am different. Somedays she just needs extra love. She loves to be held. I have started carrying her around in the baby borjn, and it makes her so happy. It is not ideal for my back, but again, it makes her so happy. She has a the sweetest smile and cutest laugh, and so when she is sad, I figure she diserves whatever she needs. The older Quinn gets the more I love both of my babies. I feel like I can appriciate the baby stage more as I enjoy Quinn's age, too. Does that make sense? Basically, it turns out, I love motherhood more with every baby and every day. That feels nice.

Just had to call the nanny to find out how to get mckenna to take a bottle!!!

Sick (Of Nursing)

McKenna has a cold. Her nose is running none stop, and, of course, she hates to have it wipes. Poor thing. I give her half a tablet of benedryl once or twice a day, and that seems to help, but Tim seems to think that is not safe. (Stupid information on the Internet empowering dad's to be armed with information...) Anyway, I thought she would be doing better today, but she is still all gross.

I have been weening her from nursing, and now that she is sick, but I just want to throw in the towel. I live this little nugget so much, and I especially love holding her and rocking her. I guess I can do all of this with a bottle. I guess it is just a matter of making a new habit.

Basically, I am weening for a few reasons. Selfishly I would like my body back. Everyone knows I am about the least vein of anyone I know, but enough is enough. I am packing on the weight like it is going out of style. And I will never forget how much I loved my body after I stopped nursing Quinn. That was heaven. So that is one reason, but I have also been having troubles with my menstrual cycle. When I left for 5 days for the 3 day walk, my body thought I was done nursing, and I started menstruating again. So on the second cycle after that -- when i was back to nursing fulltime -- the ovulation hormones where fighting the lactation hormones, and I felt like I was going crazy. I got way bloated. I got depressed for like 3 weeks until my body gave up and I got an anovultion cycle (you get your period without having ovulated -- normally about a 40 day cycle). On top of all of that I am planning to go back on clomid and have a new baby.

I guess what I am saying is let's get this show on the road. I would over think it, but it is over. I guess I am just not used to wanting my baby to stay a baby forever. I have always been all about Quinn growing up. But my McKenna is my Kenna-benna baby, and I want her to cuddle with me forever.

7 Months

My angel is 7 months now, but I keep telling people she's 6 months because I forget. And I guess I just don't want my baby to be that old.

She sits up great now, but she cries like a crazy lady if she sees me walk out of the room. Sometimes she stops, but lots of times she does not. That's not fun, but sometimes I do love a reason to hold and cuddle her for hours. I didn't do that much with Quinn; she never really needed it. But sometimes McKenna just needs a little extra love.

The only problem these days is that she doesn't like to be fed food. SHE LIKES TO FEED HERSELF, which is crazy messy and pretty confusing. I don't know what to feed her. Half of the time I cave and just stick a handful of animal crackers right in front of her. But today Bridget suggested using one of those mesh feeders. I have never thought about those for actual food consumption. I always thought they were just for giving babies something to suck on. But I filling the mesh part with apple sauce and then squash, and I think we have a winner. She got pretty messing, but she for sure got a lot in her tummy too. Dear me. At least I have clean kid. And it is certainly not my McKenna baby.

Lately, all I want to do is stay home and hug my kids. I hope McKenna is a cuddler. Quinn cuddles. I love it. And as I said, I love to hold my McKenna. Not all the time like a crazy person, but every now and then when it is just us playing, laughing and hugging.

McKenna's First Christmas

McKenna was, of course, adorable on Christmas morning. She -- unlike her sister -- was very obedient at wearing whatever I wanted her too. So she was one half of a matching pair of Christmas PJs. (Not Quinn's fault for changing. Santa brought her a new night gown.) She loved watching Quinn open things and do things, but she mostly spend her time sitting in her chair by the tree opening her own gifts. She would reach down and find one and then net thing I knew she would have it open. It rocked! She was better at opening than Quinn!!

She was a great addition to Christmas Morning. I think we'll invite her again next year.

Getting so Big!!

Oh my goodness! Avery McKenna is getting so big. Dear me. In just a few days, I had to throw dozens of outfits into the too small box. And in one day both Melissa and Tim said that she is looking super cute baby chunky. Love it.

Sitting Up

McKenna is doing more and more sitting up! It is amazing. Just like with all new baby milestones, her sitting up changes her perspective on life and our perspective on her. It really is amazing. She seems to feel a lot more comfortable with a couch behind her, but she can manage to stay sitting in the middle of the floor for quite awhile. I have been pile blankets around her so the fall is soft.

And as I said, her sitting up gives us a whole new view of her. Tim said this week, "She is totally not a newborn anymore. Her cry is even different." And Quinn is suddenly in love with McKenna. She hugs her a lot and is starting to play with her. They sat together in their new play house and pretended with play food. Quinn made the meals, and McKenna tried as hard as she could to eat them.